You must feel lonely and different. You wonder why you’ve been abandoned by the people who were supposed to love you the most.
You choose to hide your feelings from those who truly care for you, from those who rely on you. You want to run before they see the monster inside you, just as so many others have seen.
And you will run.
You think you know hurt, you think you are saving yourself, but you will choose the wrong choices and will lose all that you never knew you held dear. You will be threatened and punished, broken to your core. Trapped.
What you don’t realize is that there are things about yourself and your past that you have yet to learn. They may not be the truths that you seek. They may scare you, you may want to turn away from them, deny them. These truths will bleed you, twist your heart. You will want to end the pain and choose wrongly once again.
But your past shadows do not have to overcast your future. Trust in yourself, Aela, and trust in those who offer their help. You are wholly unique but your feelings of loneliness are shared by others. Share the weight in your heart. You can find passion, find laughter. It is closer than you realize. You are capable of happiness.
You don’t have to face these challenges alone.
Your stoic façade will serve you well. But remember my dearest Aela, that you needn’t always see kindness to give it, you needn’t see beauty to know it. When inky blackness descends, see the colors in the night. They will guide you back home again.
I will see you in the Underside of Dreams.
Be well, my friend.